The malicious genius behind this website prefers to be called Morgan, but other titles such as “Magnificent Empress of the Universe”, “Queen of all things Good and Evil” or “Your Uber-Intelligent Highness to Whom we shall All Obey” will suffice. I was born appromiximately nineteen years ago, on the 2nd of July 1990. I’d like to tell you all that I was born exactly after midnight, and my birth was predicted by a century-old prophecy involving a lot of apocalypses, world leadership and a battle between the forces of good and evil. Unfortunately this is not the case, and my prophecy-less birth happened somewhere around 5 o’clock in the morning, to the distress of my Mom who greatly dislikes getting up early.

I was born and currently still reside in a small, but beautiful country named Belgium. You may have heard from said enchanted place, since it is sometimes awkwardly quoted in television shows and movies or since it has quite a heroic history and a fair reputation when it comes to distributing yummy-licious chocolate. In case you are wondering, the “Belgae” (inhabitants of Belgium) where the tribe Caesar referred to as being especially heroic and strong (or barbaric and without any manners; translations can be tricky). We also reppear in history books for a gloriful battle at Waterloo where we defeated the feared, but tiny general Napoleon. We are currently ruled by a government of incompetent people who prefer peace above bloodthirsty war (to hell with them! my legions of undead warriors shall rule this earth in the name of the Lich King!) hence why you hardly hear from us anymore and probably forgot all about our existence. I can’t blame you: Belgium is so small that half of the population of our neighbouring country, France, hardly knows our exact location. Here’s a map of Europe to enlighten you in your search to my well-hidden country where beer is served willingly and without end to those older than sixteen, chocolate is given to any who wish to taste the sweet delicateness of this god-given treat and we have the most famous frites in the world. Yes, my fellow users of the intranetz, french frites are a wide-spread lie to hide the REAL inventors of this deliciousness! In fact, the entire history is a lie and so is evolution! We humans are NOT evolved from monkeys, we grow out of vegetables! YES, vegetables! So stop eating your stupid tomatoes, you are killing babies!